Veganism; Not for Wimps

It is now going on three months since I've decided to go vegan. This was not a decision made lightly; it was born of many hours of contemplation, and eventually of necessity.

I had been toying with the idea of veganism for a number of years. The benefits were obvious: more compassionate diet, less fat, fewer processed foods, greater nutrients etc. However, the task was daunting and moderately scary. What about protein? What about calcium and iron? What about CHEESE? I adore cheese. Local, organic, farm fresh, beautiful cheese. I think of cheese as a living food; anyone who has ever had a good sheep's milk camembert (or "Ramembert") can attest to its fluctuations, its personality, it's vitality even while living in the fridge. As I was nearly committed to eating almost exclusively live foods, cheese was a logical choice.

Then horrible things began to happen. For about a year during university I was severely intolerant of lactose. It was uncomfortable, and kinda smelly. This is when I made the switch from processed, mass produced cheese to the aforementioned living, local, lovely cheeses. This seemed to help. I also minimized the amount of cows milk foods, opting instead for goat or sheep, which really seemed to get things back on track. I noticed I could eat a small amount with no symptoms. Sated, I went about my life as a moderate eater of cheese.

Several months ago I made another discovery: all milk products hurt. I don't mean I would get a stomach cramp and maybe some accompanying unpleasantries. This was no lactose intolerance; this was a full on milk hate crime. And it was being perpetrated in my intestines.

It began with a cream based soup. I bloated to a second trimester pregnancy, and no amount of mint or ginger tea could make it calm down. After that, milk bases. Then cheese, beloved and wonderful cheese, turned on me. I decided to reduce dairy of all sorts for a while, figuring that I had perhaps overindulged and needed a break. I started to feel pretty good about it. After about two weeks of absolutely no dairy I went out for brunch and had toast with a smattering ofbutter on it. Back to square one.

I was unimpressed.

A few times after this, I had some accidental dairy (not listed in the ingredients at work, or something I hadn't checked the label of). Each time, I bloated like mad. I started to dub these incidents as having Milk Babies. Finally, after one accident, I developed a small rash on my stomach. I'd had enough. I quit dairy. I've turned into one of these crazy people you see in grocery stores pouring over the label, searching for hidden milk ingredients, sighing loudly when they're found on items that used to be favourites, or even staples in my household. By now I've discovered substitutes, but those first few weeks were trying and difficult.

The hardest part in all of this was cheese. For two months, I missed it. I craved it. I would nearly cry when an especially fabulous looking/smelling slice would pass my way. Friends would talk about some fantastic meal they had and it would inevitably involve some form of artisanal cheese. There was a cheese funeral in my head almost daily.

Now, three months later, I feel the need for cheese grieving has passed. Sometimes, I'm even a little nauseated by the smell of a (admittedly usually bad) chunk passing me by. I still think about it sometimes, but with less regret and sadness. I like to think that maybe in the next few months I might be able to reintroduce a bit of ramembert as a treat for myself, but my deep innate need for self preservation has so far prevented me from trying.

Some really wonderful things have happened since I stopped eating animal products.* I'm not dropping too much weight, but I do feel as though I am slowly becoming more svelt. My skin itches less. I'm drinking more water and eating more nuts. I'm getting more fibre, and I'm learning to feel full without adding piles of saturated fats (which outside of cheese I wasn't really getting at all).

Most notable, however, is that I have significantly less menstrual pain. My entire adolescence has seen monthly suffering with debilitating, incapacitating, sometimes vomit inducing cramping, nausea, headaches, bloating, heaviness and general malaise. In combination with homeopathy, eliminating dairy has helped produce the BEST periods of my life. I can function, I can eat, I can stand, I can even work while having my period, all thanks to homeopathic remedies and a mostly vegan diet.

It's been a hard battle discovering the hidden milk, finding substitutes that are both affordable and delicious, and getting over the sadness of not being able to eat a former favourite food. However, with all the good that has come from it, all the good I am feeling, and all the good I experience, I cannot possibly go back now.

*Note that I do not mention eggs as something eliminated. I have never been a huge fan of eggs and tended to avoid them anyway, so this was not something that was difficult for me to remove. I will, however, occasionally indulge in a non-vegan (but dairy free) breakfast item (muffin, bagel), especially at work where there are no available alternatives. I am fully of the opinion that it is better to bend the rules than be needlessly hungry, grouchy, and less cognitive. We are more likely to make poorer food choices later. Better to have half a bagel now and be energized enough to venture to find alternatives for next time.